Hi, I’m Missy Eck and I am one of the Sales and Leadership coaches with Emerge Sales Training.


When do I become a ‘leader’?  It’s a question that a student in one of my recent Your Leadership Foundation groups was asking herself as she grew her network marketing business.  Would she be a leader when she had a certain number of people on her team? Would she be a leader when she hit a certain rank?


I’ve had similar conversations with myself over the years about when I would feel like a grown up.  Can any of you relate??


I’m still waiting by the way…


One of the reasons that I’ve found people start to think about leadership is because becoming a leader can sound scary and like a lot of responsibility.  The thought of having a cool Facebook group, educating customers, and celebrating wins sounds awesome, but what about when we think about supporting our team members who get stuck, or who aren’t really sure they want to do the business?  That’s when the thought of becoming a leader can begin to feel overwhelming.


So how can we prepare ourselves for when things get real and we have to help someone who’s ready to give up?


In our leadership course we talk about how to build a culture of resilience where people have realistic expectations and keep pushing towards their goals.  A culture where builders bounce back and don’t quit.


Sounds amazing, right?


I was recently reading the book, The Leader Who Had No Title.  There is a chapter on how turbulent times build great leaders, and the author uses a skiing analogy to describe the effectiveness of leaning into fear vs resisting what makes us scared and uncomfortable.  We want to lean into the mountain for safety but sometimes we AND our team have to do the things that scare us the most in order to serve our customers well and impact our business in a positive way. We have to lean into the steep slope and trust that we will do our best.  When you can learn to relax into it and embrace all fear that comes up when you don’t know the answers or exactly where you are going some really remarkable things start to happen.


This can be applied to both our fear of becoming a leader and it can also help when you are encouraging your team to work through the things that are holding them back from success in their business.


It sounds cool to build a culture of resilience but what does that really mean and how the heck do we create this as a leader?


Set Realistic Expectations

When we meet a potential new team member our most natural reaction is to tell them all the amazing things that joining our team can do for them and share stories of crazy success, but in actuality this can come back to haunt us when someone joins our team and hits a roadblock.  If we let our newbies know that there will be amazing days where it seems that everyone says YES to our requests for appointments and buys our product, and days where we make calls and no one sets an appointment or have a class, where the audience is not quite right and no one buys.  Could this help them from feeling like a failure?


Show Them the Way

How can we get a team member unstuck??  One of the easiest ways is to let them know that we’ve been there and that there is a way through this obstacle.  Sharing stories of resilience from the get go, either 1:1 or on team calls, can paint a picture that it’s okay to have a bad day and that they are surrounded by successful teammates who have also had tough times.  If we can not only share how others have struggled but also ask really great questions to get them thinking of solutions to their obstacles, we can get them moving forward but also create a sense of autonomy and an “I can do this!” mindset.


Practice What Scares Them Most

There are typically 3 reasons that people don’t take action.  First is that they just aren’t managing their time well. Second is that they just don’t want to do the business.  And the last one is the one we can most affect as a leader – they are scared and lack confidence to do the task. It’s up to us as leaders to let go of our assumptions and do some detective work to figure out which of these 3 things is happening, then meet them where they are and help them through it!


Help Them See the Impact They Can Make

It’s easy when we are in a fearful state and lost in our dangerous thoughts to forget the goodness that lies on the other side.  We as leaders can help our team see and feel this impact by asking a few simple questions. Something like “How is not reaching out to customers impacting your personal business?” Or, “What impact could you have if you connected with a potential customer?” Or, “If you got really confident in your recruiting conversation how could that impact the team you want to build?”  These types of questions can assist in moving away from limiting beliefs and into ACTION!


I hope these small tips are helpful as you grow as a leader for your team.  Remember that leadership is a journey and that leading through the challenging times is what truly helps you grow and builds deep trust with your team.  And as I always tell my students, ‘Please give yourself grace’ and don’t expect to be perfect. At the end of the day if you are there for your team and genuinely put them first, you will be the one they turn to in times of celebration but also in times where they are really struggling and you can make a deep impact in their lives.


Thank you so much for reading!  To sign up for one of our free trainings on closing or recruiting, go to emergesalestraining.com/freetraining.  If you enjoyed today’s post, be sure to share it with your friends and leave us a review in because it’s not nice not to share.


Have a great day!



You can learn how to sell consistently and be a solid leader, without going through grueling years of hard knocks.

You can learn how to sell consistently and be a solid leader, without going through grueling years of hard knocks.

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