Recently I received a call from one of my clients  who was feeling really challenged with how to help a team member.  Have you ever been in this space of wanting to help someone on your team but you have no idea what to do or say?

To listen/watch this podcast go HERE.

So many leaders are going through their day-to-day with their team in this exact situation…

I believe that your role as the upline (even if you don’t have a team quite yet, clarifying your role as an upline will give you more confidence to bring people on to your team and make money with your company) is to encourage your team, support skill development, and really help your team be a little more clear than when they started.  It is not to be their boss, it is not to be their end-all-be-all (remember when most people join a network marketing company they do so because they don’t even want a boss).

You don’t want to be a boss either.  Your compensation plan says the following:

  • Make sales
  • Help customers with the product
  • Grow your impact through the opportunity to make an income

When we bring people on to our teams, we say something like, “Our goal is to help a lot of people, I can only help so many people… if you help some people too, then we can help more people.”

There is also a leadership development side where, if someone on your team does really well with their business, there are huge bonuses.  Something to remember is that if they are pursuing their business, it is their business, not your business.  You are not the CEO; you are taking more of a role as a coach or a mentor, and you are not their boss.

Recently I read a book, The Coaching Habit,  that talks about 7 questions you can use in coaching.  I have found they are some of the best questions in cutting through the noise and helping people more efficiently and effectively (without knowing every answer under the sun!).

If you take the questions and tuck them in your back pocket, then you can be more confident in growing your team and stepping into a space where you can encourage them towards skill development and bring clarity.

So here are the 7 questions:

  1. What’s on your mind?
  2. And what else?
  3. What’s the real challenge here?
  4. What do you want?
  5. How can I help?
  6. If you are saying “Yes” to this, what are you saying “No” to?
  7. What was most useful to you?

Let me elaborate on each one.  What I have found is that these questions help to get your team members back on track without some of the drama and rabbit trails we can go down when we are trying to get to the root of issues.

  1. What’s on your mind?
    We want to know if anything is consuming their mind right now, because unless we get that out of their mind, whatever is consuming their mind will cloud their ability to hear anything or move forward.
  2. And what else?
    We have seen that there is usually something more than just the first thing that they talk about, and it really shows that you care about them.
  3. What’s the real challenge here?
    I have done this where I have gone nuts and going on and on with my business partner, and she’ll smile and ask, “What’s the real challenge here?”  And I’ll laugh and cringe at myself at the same time and say, “There isn’t one!” or say, “It’s actually this other thing that’s bothering me.” It forces the person you are talking with to pinpoint what actually is the challenge, as opposed to you trying to identify all the different smokescreens that are out there making it hard for you to move forward.
  4. What do you want?
    This I learned before reading this book.  I actually learned it from watching Scandal, and the main character, Olivia Pope, would ask her clients this question.

    If we as leaders don’t know what our team members want, then we might send them down a path to the opposite place they or we want them to go.  Asking questions 3 and 4 can be super helpful.

    Sometimes figuring out and saying what you want clears up the challenge on its own.
  5. How can I help?
    Instead of assuming you can help, ask them… Sometimes they might not know how you can help, which may be frustrating for them. If they don’t know how you can help, you can try throwing out some ideas of how you can help, “I can help you in this way, or in this way.  Which would work better for you?”
  6. If you are saying “Yes” to this, what are you saying “No” to?
    This is powerful because you can’t do all the things.  This helps you and them with time management, planning, and prioritization, and it helps them with their critical thinking skills.
  7. What was most useful to you?
    This is awesome because now you are on the same page with your team members, you’ll know what to repeat in the future, and they know what they have taken away.

So those are the questions that I thought would be helpful for you. I hope this helps you grow in your confidence as a leader and helps the performance of your team members. 🙂

P.S. 

Would you like to grow in your confidence (and results) as a leader? Then you are invited to join our next Your Leadership Foundation group coaching program, it starts on October 15th at 11:00 am PT.  You will focus on having a clear vision, planning/prioritization as a leader, and coaching team members to get results.  You can grab the details and REGISTER HERE.

P.P.S  You are invited to join me live on October 4th for a $27 workshop where we will focus on how to get more contacts through building influence.  You can grab the details HERE.

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